Friendships are among the most delightful blessings in a child’s life. From playground games to sleepovers and birthday parties, friendships shape how kids see the world — and themselves. As Christian parents, we can guide our children toward relationships that reflect God’s love, truth, and purpose, filling them with excitement and optimism for the journey ahead.
Because while friendships can be fun and exciting, they can influence a child’s character, choices, and faith.
So, how do we help our kids build friendships rooted in Christian values?
1. Teach What Makes a Godly Friend
Before kids can choose good friends, they must understand what a good friend looks like. The Bible gives us a beautiful picture:
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Loyalty – “A friend loves at all times.” (Proverbs 17:17)
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Kindness – “Be kind and compassionate to one another.” (Ephesians 4:32)
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Honesty – “Speak the truth in love.” (Ephesians 4:15)
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Encouragement – “Encourage one another and build each other up.” (1 Thessalonians 5:11)
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Forgiveness – “Just as the Lord has forgiven you, so you must also forgive.” (Colossians 3:13)
Talk about these qualities often and celebrate them when you see your child or their friends living them out.
2. Model Healthy, Faith-Filled Friendships as a Powerful Influence
Children often learn how to treat their friends by watching how we treat ours. Let them see you offer support, pray for a friend in need, forgive quickly, and speak life — even when it’s hard.
Show them true friendships aren’t built on gossip, comparison, or convenience but Christlike love.
3. Help Them Choose Friends Wisely
You can’t (and shouldn’t) choose your child’s friends for them, but you can guide their choices with wisdom and prayer. This empowerment and control over their social circle can significantly influence their character and faith, giving you, as a parent, a sense of confidence and control in guiding your child’s friendships.
Encourage them to:
- Look for friends who share similar values.
- Stand firm in what’s right, even if a friend pressures them otherwise.
- Be a light to others while staying grounded in truth.
And remind them that it’s okay to walk away from friendships that lead them away from God.
4. Create Opportunities for Faith-Based Friendships
Be intentional about connecting your child with other kids growing in their faith. Get involved in:
- Sunday School or church youth groups
- Christian summer camps or vacation Bible school
- Family small groups with other Christian families
- Playdates or activities with like-minded families
Shared faith builds deeper connections and gives kids the confidence to live out their beliefs.
5. Equip Them for Tough Moments
Even the best friendships can face conflict. Teach your child how to handle disagreements with grace:
- Speak the truth in love.
- Be quick to forgive.
- Say sorry when they’re wrong.
- Pray for wisdom and reconciliation.
These skills will help their friendships thrive and build maturity and resilience that will bless every area of their life.
6. Remind Them of the Ultimate, Unwavering Friendship with Jesus
Above all, remind your children that Jesus is the best friend they’ll ever have. He is always present, always loving, and always faithful. When friendships feel shaky or lonely, He is their constant.
John 15:15 says, “I have called you friends.” Help your kids understand that their relationship with Jesus sets the standard for every other relationship.
Final Thoughts
Friendships rooted in Christ are a gift — both in childhood and beyond. As you guide your child to build relationships based on kindness, integrity, forgiveness, and love, you’re helping them build a life reflecting God’s heart.
Let’s raise a generation of children who not only find good friends — but who become good friends, too.
